A New Tradition with a Favorite Marinated Salad

How do you comfort families after the loss of a family member? There’s a southern way of life that is familiar and loved and honored in each small town way in the south. It happens when someone passes away. The women in a church or community come together to create a meal after a funeral. It celebrates life in gathering with comfort food. Now, a southerner knows that when someone dies, the family who has lost a loved one needs love and comfort. That comes out in food here. That happened last week with “Aunt Helen’s Marinated Salad”.

You see, when Aunt Helen shared her recipe with me, I in turn shared it with my sister. That marinated vegetable salad became my sister’s favorite food to make for potlucks, celebrations or funerals. When her husband passed away…I knew what I needed to provide for the family gathering.

Marinated vegetable salad was requested.

There are many traditions that have been carried on from generation to generation in our small towns. The simple act of taking food to the family’s home was a comfort I remembered when I lost my Dad. Although you don’t feel much like eating during those times of loss…the sheer act of someone’s provision is among my memories of comfort and feeling loved by neighbors, church family and friends. Back then, only meals with family members in the home was the norm. No events hosted by friends held at a local church or place for the family and friends to gather happened.

The evolution of gathering together was a cherished reminder that the family was loved and comforted.

As I brought in a double batch of marinated salad for the after funeral meal, the “friend” who took the bowl from my hands, was overjoyed.

You see, even though I left the small town I grew up in, that recipe had transitioned to a position of being a highly regarded item at funeral meals. Who knew that my sister chose this dish to take so often that it was a “looked forward” to recipe added to that buffet table?

That marinated salad had now taken its rightful place as a funeral comfort food.

Can I tell you that this tradition of taking a dish to those who have lost a loved one is one I never want to see disappear?

So often this custom has transitioned to even filling a need at the funeral home if they have a private eating area for the family.

In our area it’s become a custom to have a 2-3 hour visitation prior to the funeral. That in itself makes for a long day for family members greeting visitors.

This time, a curried chicken salad on croissants, a meat and cheese tray, chips, fruit, and drinks provided family members something to hold them until after the visitation, funeral and burial services pushed the funeral meal until dinner. Seven hours of celebrating life without sustenance is a little difficult.

Somewhere in the middle of the visitation, a tray of individually wrapped pimento cheese half sandwiches appeared on the funeral home family area buffet.

No clue who made them, but they were delicious and a simple act that was enjoyed by all. If you aren’t from the south…you may not realize that pimento cheese sandwiches (most often on white bread) is classic.

AND loved by all.

How do you love on those family and friends who lose members?

Although flowers were in abundance, for the gravesite and individual family members, there were other more “personal” conveyances of love and appreciation provided.

Death can often bring issues and complications.

Even if you don’t live in the south, may I suggest that you think about the gifts you have to offer that would bring comfort to others?

For me, it’s always been about food. For you, it might be a simple note to brighten spirits or a bush planted for a lasting memorial. Maybe, it is gathering or conversation after everyone has gone.

Whatever you know in your heart that you need to do to offer comfort, do that.

And…in case you need Aunt Helen’s Marinated Salad recipe again…

Marinated salad for more celebrations in your life.

Just a tip when taking food to families after a loss of a family member–

• Place food items in containers that DO NOT have to be returned. Plastic containers for items that only need refrigeration. Aluminum pans for things that need baking or warming in the oven.
• Don’t forget to add a label with your name…and if you are from the south, an address label for families to mail a thank you note back might be appreciated. OR simply adding a note that says–no thank you note required might be even better.
• Items that can be frozen are always appreciated when there is an abundance of food taken to the family.
• If you don’t cook–pick up plates, napkins, silverware or cups to help the family not have to wash dishes.
• No time to cook? Pick up fried chicken from Walmart, a favorite deli salad or even bagels might be appreciated.
• Zippered storage bags are often helpful to help with food storage for the fridge.

Here are a few affiliate links to help you stock your pantry when loss happens where you may need to take something…

Affiliate links simply offer easy shopping access at no additional cost. See my disclosure policy.

How do you help provide comfort for families who have lost someone?

I’d love to know in the comments.

Don’t forget to print or save this recipe on Pinterest. This recipe was loved this year for Easter lunch. It will make its appearance again for family gatherings for the 4th of July, birthday parties, Memorial Day and picnics.

Hope you love it as much as those who have shared it with our family.

Blessings to you all,